how to deal with colleagues

They defy our expectations, and we feel frustrated.

When I coach executives or mediate conflicts between leaders, each person is always amazed at how the other people behave.

Because the world is more global and organizations are more diverse, the likelihood we will interact with people very different from us is increasing exponentially.

A Secret for Contending with Colleagues Harvard Business Online By Peter Bregman

A few months ago my wife Eleanor came home upset after an incident with one of the parents at our daughter's school.

When I coach executives or mediate conflicts between leaders, each person is always amazed at how the other people behave.

Think of every interaction as an experiment that explains a little bit more about the individual you're dealing with.

According to Mike Schell, co-author of the excellent book, Managing Across Cultures: The 7 Keys to Doing Business with a Global Mindset, Indian workers prefer—and expect— to be micromanaged.

In others, it's simply the norm.

That afternoon, when Eleanor said hello to Michelle, Michelle completely ignored her.

Because the world is more global and organizations are more diverse, the likelihood we will interact with people very different from us is increasing exponentially.

When operating in a new country, we don't just need word translators.

I shouldn't need instructions on what to expect from him.

Because the world is more global and organizations are more diverse, the likelihood we will interact with people very different from us is increasing exponentially.

Just change your expectations to more accurately align with reality.

Here's my advice: don't go to a hardware store and get upset when they won't sell you milk.

Be more or less aggressive.

When I coach executives or mediate conflicts between leaders, each person is always amazed at how the other people behave.

I shouldn't need instructions on what to expect from him.

Why doesn't my spouse appreciate what I do for her?

Mike told me recently: "That ultimate sin of Western managers is the best way to get things accomplished in some cultures.

At this point, should you still be surprised when your boss for the 100th time doesn't invite you to a meeting?

A Secret for Contending with Colleagues Harvard Business Online By Peter Bregman

A few months ago my wife Eleanor came home upset after an incident with one of the parents at our daughter's school.

In some cultures it's rude to interrupt.

And that helps you work with them more effectively


When I'm sitting in a meeting with Yukiko, my Japanese partner, and she doesn't speak, I might assume she agrees with what I'm saying.

Again, no response.

Because once you accept your colleagues, once you realize you simply can't buy milk at a hardware store, you might decide you don't want to be in a hardware store at all.

It's amazing how changing your expectations can change your experience.

She was able to respond, she just refused to.

Still, she was thrown off balance by Michelle's cold shoulder.

Think of every interaction as an experiment that explains a little bit more about the individual you're dealing with.

When I coach executives or mediate conflicts between leaders, each person is always amazed at how the other people behave.

A Secret for Contending with Colleagues Harvard Business Online By Peter Bregman

A few months ago my wife Eleanor came home upset after an incident with one of the parents at our daughter's school.

They had only spoken a few times in the past, most notably when she called Eleanor to complain about something our daughter did.

This has led me to a very simple conclusion.

Mike told me recently: "That ultimate sin of Western managers is the best way to get things accomplished in some cultures.

Here's my advice: don't go to a hardware store and get upset when they won't sell you milk.

According to Mike Schell, co-author of the excellent book, Managing Across Cultures: The 7 Keys to Doing Business with a Global Mindset, Indian workers prefer—and expect— to be micromanaged.

How can my colleague have taken the credit?

"That depends," I answered, "will you be OK with it when she blows you off?"

Because the world is more global and organizations are more diverse, the likelihood we will interact with people very different from us is increasing exponentially.

Think of every interaction as an experiment that explains a little bit more about the individual you're dealing with.

This has led me to a very simple conclusion.

According to Mike Schell, co-author of the excellent book, Managing Across Cultures: The 7 Keys to Doing Business with a Global Mindset, Indian workers prefer—and expect— to be micromanaged.

Once you understand your colleagues' operating instructions, you might decide to approach them differently.

According to Mike Schell, co-author of the excellent book, Managing Across Cultures: The 7 Keys to Doing Business with a Global Mindset, Indian workers prefer—and expect— to be micromanaged.

Because each one of us is, in effect, from a different culture.

But Chris in the office next door?